It's A Trap

Since we are on the subject of ESPN’s “It’s not crazy.  It’s sports” advertising campaign, I have to highlight the cream of the crop which plays more like a documentary than a commercial.  The great disappointment of this ad and the real life events that inspired it is that real life (and copyright law) interjected itself into the delightful story of an internet meme’s attempt to turn the self-righteousness of the Southern football “tradition” on its head.  Wouldn’t it have been great if those prim and proper dance squad ladies that think it is appropriate to celebrate a legacy of slavery with the nickname of their past it's prime ball team had to  now wear a shirt with a prune-faced alien to their Saturday tailgate party.  Ahhh…what could have been.

Solitaire Update

The updates keep coming.  Not much new to report at this point.  I am beginning to pile up some sizable N's for what my normal rate of success is.  Before I can really appreciated  whether any potential strategies that I mentioned in that first Solitaire post has an impact on success, I have to understand what success looks like.  Right now we are settling in on a number of approximately 1 win for every 6 hands of cards.  Although the almost 200 hands played seems like a lot, there still seems to be some real movement in the numbers.  I think to get a true stable baseline, I need to go a total of 1000 hands.  So that is my goal right now.  1000 hands of solitaire with the standard straight ahead strategy.  Then we will see where we are and go from there.

Day 12 - 1 of 10 (203.5)
Day 13 - 1 of 12 (203.5)
Day 14 - 1 of 1 (203.5, 3.52, 48.34)
Day 15 - 1 of 8 (202, 3.49, 48.16)
Day 16 - 1 of 5 (203)
Day 17 - 3 of 7 (202.5, 3.55, 48.05)
Day 18 - 0 of 9 (202.5, 3.53, 48.05)
Day 19 - 3 of 5 (201.5, 3.56, 47.94)
Day 20 - 0 of 5 (200.5, 3.76, 50.58)
Overall Success Rate - 30 out of 191 (15.7%)

This blog post is sponsored by Allinol.

Mine. All Mine.

Just when I was sure that the only person to ever see the words that I type on this blog was me, my little sis went and left a comment on the last post.  Despite my claim that the humor in the Lady Gaga in a labcoat video was mainly for the lab rat set, she was there to let me know that it did have a more broad appeal.  Well, this can't be.  I have failed the most sacred tenet of this blog.  For just a brief moment, this blog brought a smile to the face of someone that is not me.  I will not let this stand.  If the last post was not sufficiently nerdy or dorky enough to turn off 99% of population, then I will make sure this one is.  And for that I will turn to the comic strip Piled Higher and Deeper (PhD).  It is based entirely around a group of poor, struggling graduate students and their eternal struggle to get there degree and move onto a job market that can't support them.  Now that is insider humor.  Try to enjoy this Teen.  A comic strip about how what we publish in scientific journals gets hopelessly twisted by main stream media and the average lay person (insider and elitist - now we are talking reader repellent).  Of course most people publishing articles in scientific journals would consider themselves lucky someone even read their work let alone have it wildly distorted by the main stream media.

This blog post is sponsored by Lunar Industries.

I Love Lady Gaga's New Back-Up Dancers

I have now been forwarded the Lady Gaga in a lab coat video enough times that I just have to go ahead and archive it here.  It doesn't hurt that no matter how many times I receive the "You have to watch this" e-mail, I can't help but do just that.  It is addictive.  It is hilarious.  It is the lab rats of the world taking something cool and dorking it up for their own amusement.  The fact that those who haven't done time in a lab can only shake there head at is they say, "Why would anyone make this" only makes it that much better in my mind.  Best use of NIH grant dollars yet.

This blog post is sponsored by Veidt Enterprises.

One More Turn - Then I Will Come to Bed

I am in full recovery right now. I have not partaken in the forbidden fruit for several years. But there was a time when I had it bad. Really bad. It had taken over my life. I was obsessed with it. During those brief periods of time when I wasn't occupied with it, I was pondering when I would be able to get back to it. I couldn't stop thinking about it. Minutes would turn into hours and before I had spent all night cranking away at my addiction. Heck to call it an addiction is to terribly understate the situation. Of course I speak of that dark period of my life after I was introduced to the game, nay, way of life called Civilization.

It was during my freshman year when my roommate first introduced me to it and I was hooked on site. I had always loved the board game Risk and had a brief fling with Axis and Allies so I was easy pickings. Civ, as the cool kids call it, combined all the best features of those progenitors with modern technologies. Allowing your conquering forces to grow and evolve. To build your empire with actual cities named after yourself and dead pets. And all this was in the Stone Ages of the internet when the game was all single player. It was only the best game since Tecmo Bowl. And that is why the below ad for the newest version of the game speaks to me. I am those people. As my wife can attest, there were many a night when she would call down to me at 3:00 in morning to ask when I was coming to bed and I would answer in return, "Just one more turn."

This blog post is sponsored by Shards O'Glass Freeze Pops.

Real-Time PCR, More Than Meets the Eye

I have already written about two high-production value, web-only, musical advertisements for the tools of science. Well, now Roche Applied Sciences has taken it to the next level and produced the eagerly awaited sequel to Transformers. And in a huge twist, - SPOILER ALERT! - the Decepticons have apparently taken on the shape of the DNA double helix. Although, if that is the case, why would the Autobots take the shape of a machine that makes more DNA? So many questions. I guess we will just have to trust the genius of Micheal Bay and wait until the official release date to get all of our answers. For now we will have to make due with this Roche-sponsored trailer. I don't know if this CGI-heavy advert makes me want to spend several thousand dollars on a PCR machine, but it does make me want to watch WALL-E again. And it continues this new tradition of spending a ton money on commercials that noone other than the dedicated nerdy will see.

For a point of contrast, let me also offer-up this truly awful example of attempted viral marketing by Promega. Matching this effort with the four I previously presented is an insult to the other four. They look to have had $5 and a Big Mac as their production budget. Even by YouTube standards this is sad. Heck, I am not entirorly sure that some undergrads didn't do this to fill time between running gels and pirating movies. I wouldn't even embarrass my blog by including this commercial if it weren't for an OCD-like drive for completeness. So in the interest of cataloging all of the efforts of the biotech giants to use new media to sell their wares, here is "Vlad in the lab".

This blog post is sponsored by the Ajira Airways
.

When Shows are Nothing but Product Placements, the Commercials are the True Entertainment

I continue to contend that the best advertisements never make it to our TVs. Whether it is because they focus on too narrow a target audience (like lab coat clad test tube jockeys) or they are a tad bit too edgy (how this stuff is considered too edgy when the questionable content is bleeped out and shows like Grey's Anatomy are allowed to continue their assault on all that is good and descent I will never understand), we are missing out on some quality salesmanship. If my argument wasn't strong enough already, I now have two new pieces of evidence to present to the court. First is a combination of two of my most favorite things - geeky science in-jokes and boy bands (Why oh why have you forsaken us N*SYNC). If Eppendorf had the gumption to pony up the money for a TV broadcast for these entertaining productions, every kid would be asking Santa for a pipette in their stocking. For under the radar commercial number two, I give you a movie house exclusive. Not sure why this one hasn't seen the small screen yet. Catchy tune, funny lyrics. What am I missing? Is it the explosive combination of Wal-mart and Coke? Those two revelutionary brands being on the screen at the same time too much for the average consumer? Anyway, now that the commercial is on YouTube, I can finally learn the words to the new Christmas classic, "Joy! Enough to go Round". "My judo coach, my allergist, my MySpace friends, my Twitter list."

This blog post is sponsored by the Nakatomi Trading Corporation.

A Real American Movie - GI Joe

My two favorite childhood cartoons/toy lines were the Transformers and GI Joe. So, I was suitably stoked when the Transformers live action movie was first announced. Thankfully, I was not disappointed when the final product arrived on the big screen (as long as I block out all of the scenes involving John Turturro). Now the men with the kung-fu grip are also heading to the silver screen (sometime in the summer of 2009). Hopefully they take the big budget approach and do this thing right (Lots of explosions, little talking, and maybe a weather control device that is broken into 3 pieces and scattered to the far corners of the world). With a live action He-Man movie also on the way, all we need now is a Thundercats extravaganza and my entire childhood will have been successfully mass marketed to a new generation.

Most of the casting for the primary roles has now been announced. For the most, the cast looks like a strong mix of notable character actors. People that should really provide some color to their cartoon-inspired roles. There are really only a couple disappointing or unusual choices though. I would have liked to have seen a more firmly established personality inhabit Duke, the alpha dog of the Joes. The selection of another bland, nameless, generic Hollywood boy toy to head up this effort seems to be a step in the wrong direction. Joseph Gordon-Levitt has done fantastic work in movies like Brick and the Lookout but doesn't seem to have the size or the age to pull off the Cobra Commander. I guess the choice of a prepubescent Duke required his nemesis to also be on the younger side. But again, a less than stellar casting choice. Overall, though, I would give a thumbs up to the cast. The international flavor is a nice touch. Marlon Wayans does seem like an odd choice but I imagine they wanted some comedy relief and he is just as good as anyone for that role. Although, I can think of some other G.I. Joe team members that would be better for him to portray for laughs than Ripcord. Shipwreck was always one of the cutups on the cartoon. Why not him? In choosing the Joes and the Cobra members to include in the movie, they did grab all the big ones. Flint and Lady Jaye must have just missed the cut on the Joe side and Serpentor and Dr. Mindbender would seem perfect for a sequel (Here is hoping this movie warrants one). I just hope the movie does not become the Ninja show. Snake Eyes and Storm Shadow kind of took over the G.I. Joe comic book series. As a final show of the level of geekiness I have for the G.I. Joe world, I have matched up the actors from the movie with there cartoon counterparts. Others have done this but those lists are already out of date.

The Joes

Channing Tatum as Duke


Rachel Nichols as Scarlett


Dennis Quaid as General Hawk

Ray Park as Snake Eyes


Saïd Taghmaoui as Breaker


Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje as Heavy Duty

Marlon Wayans as Ripcord

Cobra


Joseph Gordon-Levitt as the Cobra Commander


Christopher Eccleston as Destro


Sienna Miller as the Baroness


Byung-hun Lee as Storm Shadow


Arnold Vosloo as Zartan

An Apple a Day

If there is one company that knows how to produce a catchy advertisement, it is Apple Computers. I guess you have to be good at selling an image when your business model is predicated on convincing people to shell out hard earned for over-priced, under-powered, proprietary, closed system technology. Apple is especially good at IDing cool new musical ditties that stick in your head like a starving brain sucker (my sisters always seemed to have one of those on their heads as children). If radio stations were this good at putting enjoyable music on the air, people might still listen to them. But then again, that is the way it is with all technology advertising. Convincing people to pay way to much to buy something they can't possibly use to its full potential. I have an iPhone that can synthesize food from air, diagnose disease, and fight crime at nights as a masked vigilante but I use it mostly to call my mom. Hey, but at least the $600 price tag came with a felling of self importance and belonging. And now a few of my favorite tech commercial parodies.

Sold on Science

Despite being a multi-billion dollar industry, you will never see an ad for a biotechnology company run during the Super Bowl. Up til now biotech ads have be relegated to the science geek ghetto of hard core, full frontal, peer-reviewed science journals. This meant of course that they always took the form of an exceedingly dry, stationary, 2-D solicitation. But thanks to the wonders of the internet, biotech companies can now finally enter the 19th century realm of moving pictures. And based on the geeky humor of these ads by microarray producer Illumina and general biotech supply company BioRad, biotech is ready to go straight to the big leagues. Come on, there are more people doing PCR than will ever drink PepsiMax (now with extra carcinogens).

Why isn't this a Real Movie

From the people who brought you Facebook/Off, now comes the latest worldwide blockbuster, Minesweeper: The Movie. Actually, I wouldn't mind seeing a full length version of either of these. Are these movie ideas any worse than basing a 2 hour story on a 5 minute amusement park ride? And since we are considering making movies out of non-traditional computer-based properties, can we please have an Oregon Trail: The Movie?

More Time to Play with his Transformers

Bill Gates is calling an end to an era. He is stepping down as the head of day-to-day operations of Microsoft. It is hard to remember a day in my life when he wasn't serving as the most powerful man in the world. I guess he will just have to settle for the richest. And get this, he is quitting his day job to commit all of his time to giving away all his money. How un-American. To mark this moment in history, Mr. Gates has made a video detailing his transition. As fine an actor as the ultimate geek is, his farewell note is only the second best out of office memo produced by a powerful, well-known leader of men.

American Gladiators

If you don't watch, you are un-American and must report to immediately to Guantanamo Bay for reeducation.

The Real Thing

An update to my recent post. I was able to find an MP3 of the Video Games Live! performance of the Mario Brothers' Theme Music. I am not sure if it is an authorized version but it sure does make me want that full sound track. Here it is for you to enjoy as well.

Does This Make Them More Geeky

While we are on the theme of video game-inspired musical performances, here is a University of California Marching Band interpretation of Nintendo's greatest hits that was going around the net a couple of months ago. They hit on Pong, Tetris, Mortal Combat, Pokemon, Legend of Zelda, and Mario Brothers. In addition to the joy of hearing these classics boomed out with 76 trombones and 110 cornets, I particularly enjoyed the band geek posturing taking place on the message board of the YouTube video. Some self-absorbed fellows bragging up their competitive high school band, touting their ability to do the routine better in their sleep. Band nerds that perform scenes from video games are near the top of the dorkiness pyramid. But band nerds that hang out on YouTube message boards to trash talk out marching band's choreography takes it to a whole new level.

Modern Classical Music

It seems people have finally found a better use for all those concert halls than presenting poorly attended, stodgy operas or putting on the 1,342,922,102 orchestral rendition of Tchicovsky's 1812 Overature. Instead, some people have picked up on the idea that they can fill those seats by playing music most people of today know and love. At least on the subliminal level. Whose ears don't perk up with instant recognition at the first couple of notes of the Mario Brothers theme? Someday our grandkids will wonder they are forced to dress up and go to the theater for a performance Donkey Kong's Unfinished Symphony. My only question is why aren't they selling a CD of their performances of Video Games Live? I would like one please.



Speaking of good uses of empty concert hall seats, here is another fun one. Although less culturally relevant, still a fun bit of pop art utilizing a common language known world wide. Video games, especially our old 8-bit favorites, are now a firm part our shared history.

The Original Human SPACE INVADERS

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